Coaching Youth Soccer – Do You Treat Your Child Differently? »
By Muz on Dec 9, 2007 in Coaching Youth Soccer
When a soccer parent finds himself or herself coaching a soccer team, usually they will find themselves coaching their own child. This is often the case in soccer. From my personal experience, [tag-tec]coaching a youth soccer[/tag-tec] team with your child can be very rewarding however it can also be difficult for both your child and you as a [tag-tec]soccer coach[/tag-tec]. Do you treat your child any differently or just as another member of the team?
I can put my hand up here and say that unintentionally, I have in the past treated both my children differently when I have coached them. I have been reminded of this a number of times when I have been driving home from a soccer game. A comment something like “why do you always pick on me dad and not the other players’? As a youth [tag-tec]soccer coach[/tag-tec] that has a child in the team, more often than not your child becomes subjected to inappropriate pressures and/or actions.
When [tag-tec]coaching youth soccer[/tag-tec] as a parent-coach, you should always treat your child the same as you would any other member of the team. In other words, do not be overcritical of their performance or make your child the star of your team. Doing so, can cause a rift and dissension among the team and not only will you lose on the scoreboard but you will also lose out in creating team camaraderie. This is particularly important as playing [tag-tec]soccer[/tag-tec] at the youth level is as much about establishing and forming relationships as it is about learning the game. Additionally, favoring your child can not only lead to dissension amongst team mates but can also lead to off field disharmony amongst parents.
Lets not forget the ultimate goal and that is playing [tag-tec]soccer[/tag-tec] is for a child to have fun while spending time with his or her team mates. I have witnessed some soccer coaches constantly yelling and berating their own children during a game. This more often than not leads to the child ‘turning off’ and not listening and participating in the rest of the game. This leads to a lose-lose situation, the team suffers and you become more agitated and frustrated. This can ultimately affect the relationship with your child and may have an affect on your relationship for years to come. As a [tag-tec]soccer parent[/tag-tec]-coach, you need to step back during a game and take time out if you find yourself being over critical of your own child’s performance.
Another situation the parent-coach needs to be mindful of is if there is a parent–child relationship problem at home. Do not let this carry over onto the soccer training pitch or game day. This can be become embarrassing for not only you but also be an embarrassment for your child and make them feel very uncomfortable. Children at this age are very vulnerable and are very much aware of the image they portray to their peers.
In summary, enjoy your time coaching youth soccer and being involved in a sport that your child is involved in is tremendously rewarding. As a soccer coach, If you find yourself placing inappropriate pressure on your child, step back, take a deep breath and reconsider your actions, your relationship with your child is more important than any soccer game.